WHEN I WAS YOUNG - LOWER DOUBLE DIGITS - I TRIED TO FIND PORN ON THE INTERNET.
THE CLOSEST TO SEX I EVER CAME WAS MAKING MY SIMS WOOHOO. I KNOW YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. THE FIRST SIMS GAME WOULD BLUR OUT THE BED WHILE THE SIMS JUMPED UNDER THE COVERS FOR A MINUTE OR TWO. FLOWERS OR HEARTS WOULD EXPLODE FROM THE BED AND - JUST LIKE THAT - THE SEX WAS COMPLETE.
I WAS FASCINATED TO SAY THE LEAST. NEWER VERSIONS OF THE SIMS CAME OUT AND SUDDENLY IT WAS POSSIBLE TO WOOHOO IN CARS, IN DRESSING ROOMS, AND IN HAY BAILS. I WAS A WOOHOO FANATIC! MY FAVORITE SIM, DON, WOULD WOOHOO ANYTHING THAT WALKED. HE GOT CAUGHT BY THE MAID - WHO HE ALSO SLEPT WITH - WHEN SHE STOPPED BY TO CLEAN THE CLOGGED TOILET.
DURING MY FIRST PORN SEARCH, I TRIED - REALLY TRIED - TO BE DISCRETE ABOUT IT. I GOOGLE-SEARCHED "WEENIE" AND CAME UP WITH LOTS OF HOT DOG COLORING PAGES AND DACHSHUND DOGS. I TRIED AGAIN TO FIND A PENIS WITHOUT ACTUALLY SEARCHING THE WORD 'PENIS' WITH NO LUCK. HOW CLOSE TO PORN DID I THINK GOOGLE IMAGES WAS GOING TO GET ME?
I GAVE UP ON GOOGLE WHEN I DISCOVERED ROMANCE NOVELS. THIS WAS MY PORN FOR MANY LONG, FRUSTRATING YEARS. PEOPLE MAKE ACTUAL MONEY WRITING OUT SEX SCENES. I FOUND MY FAVORITE SEX WRITER - LORI FOSTER - WHO HAD SOME KIND OF FETISH FOR UFC (MMA?) FIGHTERS AND DOMESTIC ABUSE VICTIMS. I DIDN'T CARE ABOUT THE BACK STORY, I JUST SKIPPED TO THE DIRTY SEX SCENES. THERE ARE ACTUAL CREASES IN THE SPINES OF MY ROMANCE BOOKS AT EACH SEX SCENE. EASY FLIP-SEARCH. THIS IS MY VERSION OF A CUM RAG - A CREASED SPINE.
THESE BOOKS GOT ME OFF FOR YEARS. UNTIL I DISCOVERED TUMBLR PORN BLOGS. THIS WAS GREAT!! NO CREEPY "REDTUBE" URL'S IN MY COMPUTERS HISTORY - JUST GOOD OLD FASHIONED TUMBLR.
I HAD MY FAVORITE BLOGS THAT POSTED FULL LENGTH VIDEOS. IF YOU'VE EVER WATCHED PORN, YOU KNOW THE SEARCH FOR A SOLID PORN TO GET OFF TO IS A LOT LONGER OF A PROCESS THAN THE ACTUAL ACT OF MASTURBATING. A PORN COULD BE GREAT QUALITY BUT I WAS ALWAYS THROWN OFF BY THE GREASY HAIRED ACTRESSES, THE HUGE HOOP EARRINGS, THE KNEE HIGH SOCKS. IT TOOK ME SOME SIGNIFICANT TIME TO CURATE MY PORN LIBRARY WITH ACTUAL QUALITY PORN THAT TURNED ME ON.
THE SEX INDUSTRY DOES PORN VERY WRONG. I'M REPULSED TO KNOW THAT MEN ACTUALLY CUM TO THIS MATERIAL. THE CUM SHOTS TO THE FACE WITH THICK GOBS OF DRIPPING JIZZ EVERYWHERE MAKES ME NEED TO VOMIT. THE FAKE CIRCULAR NON-MOVING BOOBS. THE FAKE MOANS. THE ZOOM-INS TO THE WOMAN'S FACE DURING SEX RUINS MY MOOD COMPLETELY. WHO IS SHE? SHE'S NOT ENJOYING THIS! I'M NOT ENJOYING THIS! WHO ENJOYS THIS!
THERE ARE A SURPLUS OF PORN GENRES TO CHOSE FROM. TEEN PORNOGRAPHY. VIRGIN GANG BANGS. RAPE FETISHES. PUBLIC HUMILIATION. BUTT STUFF. INTERRACIAL. OUTDOORS. THREESOMES. ORGIES. CAMEL TOES. PURPOSEFUL IMPREGNATION. PREGNANT WOMEN. FOOT FETISHES. GIRL ON GIRL. GUY ON GUY. FEMALE DOMINATION. GIANT BOOBS. BDSM. FACE SITTING. SPANKING. CUM SHOTS. CRYING. SQUIRTING. MILKING. GOLDEN SHOWERS. CREAM PIES. FISTING. JERK OFF INSTRUCTION. EVEN INCEST PORNOGRAPHY. THREESOMES WITH PARENTS AND CHILDREN. SEX BETWEEN SIBLINGS. I WANT TO VOMIT (THERE'S A PORN FOR THAT TOO, CALLED EMETOPILIA).
RECENTLY, THE SEX INDUSTRY HAS TRIED TO CREATE "FEMALE FRIENDLY" OR "SEX POSITIVE" PORN. WHAT IS "FEMALE FRIENDLY"??? SHOULDN'T ALL PORN GET BOTH SEXES OFF? WHY ARE THERE TOO DIFFERENT CATEGORIES? ARE YOU TELLING ME MEN ONLY CUM TO THIS NASTY, LOW QUALITY BULLSHIT??
"FEMALE FRIENDLY" PORN HAPPENS TO ALSO MEAN BORING AS SHIT. THERE IS MUSIC - LIKE STRANGE SLOW, CLASSICAL MUSIC. THE ACTORS ARE BOTH ATTRACTIVE YOUNG ADULTS. THE SEX IS "PASSIONATE" AND MOSTLY MISSIONARY. SHE "CUMS" WHILE HE DOES AND THAT IS IT - BORING AS SHIT. THEY DON'T SWITCH POSITIONS, THEY DON'T GET ROUGH, THEY DON'T DO ANYTHING. IS THIS WHAT THE PORN INDUSTRY THINKS WE WANT TO SEE? I'M FUCKING LIVID!!!! THIS IS NOT QUALITY SEX EITHER!!!!
IT'S A SCIENTIFIC FACT THAT 'STRAIGHT' WOMEN WATCH MORE LESBIAN PORN THAN STRAIGHT PORN. THIS IS BECAUSE WOMEN ARE SEXIER, MORE INTIMATE, IN BED. THERE ARE SOME GREAT LESBIAN PORNS OUT THERE THAT I HAVE NO ISSUE GETTING OFF TO. PORN QUALITY DEPENDS ON THE VIBE BETWEEN THE PARTICIPANTS. WEIRD THINGS CAN BE HAPPENING SEXUALLY AND I'LL STILL BE SUPER INTO IT IF I CAN SEE THAT THE PARTICIPANTS ARE SUPER INTO IT.
I ENJOY ASKING GUYS I'M SEEING TO SEND ME THEIR FAVORITE PORN CLIPS. THIS ALWAYS MAKES THINGS INTERESTING. I'VE RECEIVED THREESOMES, INTERRACIAL THREESOMES, JERK OFF INSTRUCTIONS - YOU NAME IT. IT'S A PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE WAY FOR MEN TO TELL ME WHAT THEY WANT WITHOUT ACTUALLY ASKING FOR IT. SOMETIMES IT PISSES ME OFF, BECAUSE HELL NO, YOU WON'T BE CUMMING ON MY BEAUTIFUL, ACNE CLEAN, SCRUMPTIOUS SMELLING FACE. NO. NOT HAPPENING. IF YOU WANT TO CUM IN MY BUTT HOLE, THOUGH, WE MIGHT BE ABLE TO ARRANGE THAT.
IT'S GIVE AND TAKE.